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Choose to feel good first.
Your mind won’t believe it.
It will tell you those tools and processes won’t work. They won’t feel as good as a drink, or a drug, or a drivethru.
Remember the last time life was running smoothly. What was different?
You decided to care about how you felt.
You told your mind to shut the fuck up.
Once you learn the lesson for yourself, you’ll forget.
But you’ll remember again, and this time it’s easier.
You’ll go higher, further, deeper.
When you get so low that you’re afraid for your health, or your safety, or your life,
just laugh. It’s not that serious. I promise.
Your laugh is your ticket to the ride back up.
When you feel good, milk it. Milk it, milk it, milk it.
Remember every detail. Paint pictures. Pray harder than ever before.
You’ll be so grateful you have a bookmarked place to return to.
When you start blaming caffeine, or weed, or your job for your bad mood,
remember that when you feel good, none of those things matter.
You can have it all.
Take a picture of your good feelings. Write them down.
When you feel bad enough, you’ll remember about your bookmarks.
How did I feel good again?
Eventually you’ll prove to yourself again and again,
feeling good is the only way to get what you want.
Feel good no matter what. Feel good no matter what.
When you catch that good feeling, memorize it.
Write about it. Be it. Bask in the feeling of feeling good
even though you’re broke. Even though you’re broken.
And what you want will come,
and you won’t care,
because you already have everything you need inside.
Tuesday Tips is a weekly collection of ideas that make living life more fun. Explore ways to channel your energy, gain power over your mind, feel like a million trillion bucks, and be the perfect badass you know you are.
1. Look for evidence of your power.
If you haven’t had a lot of practice with manifestation, now’s the time to start! The easiest way to begin noticing the power of your focus is by looking for synchronous times on clocks. Look for 11:11, 12:34, 3:33, etc, then watch as every glance at the clock becomes synchronous. Then try cars! Pick a few of your favorite cars and intend to see them on the road. (I love seeing Hummers!) As soon as you start looking for them, your favorite cars will show up at the most serendipitous times.
2. Write!
On page 50 of Design Writing Research by Ellen Lupton and Abbott Miller, there’s an essay on the idea that writing is an extension of the body. “It is a physical by-product, a material trace of human activity [...] It is also akin to hair, finger nails, and the surface of the skin—each is a part of the body that is continually regenerated yet biologically dead, detachable, disposable.” In essence, writing is another form of bodily excrement, like blood, sweat, semen, and saliva. Get it out of you!
3. I made it!
Try using the mantra “I made it.” Think about what that implies. On one hand, it means succeeding at a goal or endeavor. On the other, it means “I created this.” Same thing, right?
4. See your mind and body as one.
If your body is tense, it’s a physical manifestation of your mind resisting. Margo in the School of Life Design group helped me understand that “since the mind and body are one, you can always tell how you are mentally by how you feel physically.” If you’re tense, you’re resisting. If you’re relaxed, you’re allowing. Margo also reminded me that silent counting is an immediate way to go from resisting to allowing.
5. Stop resisting.
There were lots of other great ideas on releasing resistance in the above thread. Jenny’s is spot on!
Sometimes when I am walking or in the car and I am getting worked up and resisting and not in the present… I stop and pretend that the whole world is a movie set just for me. I look for all the awesome details like the quirky old guy walking with huge headphones on and the precious little purple flower sticking up from a crack in the concrete. I think to myself ‘Yes!! This is awesome! This I all here for ME! This world is full of beautiful things for me to enjoy!’
6. Find the best feeling you can feel.
Danielle Laporte has a great advice-tweet: “What would feel really, really, good to feel? Intend to feel that way.” Essentially, picture feeling the best you can feel, and choose that feeling now.
7. Practice the feeling of freedom on your bike.
Kelly and I started commuting to work via bicycle last week. The 16-mile round trip joy ride through Austin reminds me of how much freedom I have. I can go anywhere, see anything, do whatever I want! And on a bicycle, I get to luxuriate in the scenery and people-watching, and I feel so much more willing to make stops along the adventure because I don’t have to worry about parking. Six months later, I am so happy to call myself a cyclist again!
8. What does 100% certainty feel like?
In a lucid dream, you can only “make things happen” if you have 100% certainty that you can. The same goes for waking life. Practice that feeling of knowing and you’ll find yourself feeling that same certainty about more and more things you want to manifest.
9. Listen to Halcyon’s morning blessing as soon as you wake up.
I find it hardest to direct my thoughts first thing in the morning. Often, I’ve forgotten all the good-feeling thoughts I collected the day before. Halcyon’s 12-minute morning blessing meditation has made my mornings so much easier and more blissful, I can’t recommend it enough. Don’t judge it in the afternoon or evening, because it won’t have the same effect. Just try it one morning when you’re not feeling as good as you want to, and listen the whole way through. By the end you’ll have tears of joy streaming down your face, I guarantee it!
10. Sleep more.
It’s ok. The world will wait. Everything feels better when you’re getting enough sleep, and nothing matters more than how you feel.
11. Surrender to the ability to receive.
In Halcyon’s morning blessing, he reminds us to “let go of the drive to achieve, and surrender to the ability to receive.” The things you want will come effortlessly if you allow them to. Let them come to you. Know that they’re all coming. Relax and bask in the Now. There is nothing you can do to get the things you want. It is an emotional journey every single time. Choose to feel good and enjoy this moment right now, and you will open yourself up to the gifts from the universe.
12. See your life through the eyes of god.
Tell yourself “I love you, you’re doing great.” And tell everyone around you the same thing.
If you are reading this site, you are conscious. You understand that you are not your thoughts or feelings, because you can observe them. You are bigger. You are everything in your reality. You are the creator. You are god.
It doesn’t matter whether it was depression, hallucinogens, or luck that woke you up. All that matters is that consciousness is the new norm, a meme rippling through the world faster than “Shit White Girls Say.”
We are in the midst of a global awakening, where people are coming to know their divine power and learning how to use it. We all got hooked on the law of attraction, thinking we could finally manifest all the things we wanted. But this evolution of human consciousness is much bigger than learning how to attract money, health and love for ourselves.
Whether via meditation, movement, tragedy or DMT, more individuals are stepping back from their minds to don the broader perspective of life itself. We can feel our connectedness both online and off. There is no map or outline for the expansion of awareness, because we are writing it as we live it. The outcome of this evolution has yet to be determined. So I am writing this to ask: what do WE want? What do we want as a society? Where do we want to see humanity go? What do we want life to be like, now that we know it can be any way we wish?
As fun as it is to learn how to manifest my own desires, I’m starting to see how much better this would be if we all worked together. It’s a lot easier to believe something when other people believe it too.
What do we want to believe in together? I have my ideas, but I want yours too. For now I present a Life Design Manifesto, a public declaration of principles and intentions to direct the flow of this evolution, or more literally, the design of life itself. These are the things I want for everyone, and that I want everyone to want for me. If we all believe these principles to be true, then they are. And that’s the way life will unfold.
A Life Design Manifesto
- Life is an adventure, meant to be explored, expanded and enjoyed.
- Each individual is an integral and perfect beacon of light, burning with the same source energy that supports the thriving of all life.
- We know the creative power of our thoughts and direct our focus accordingly.
- We project a vibration of unconditional love.
- We let go the of the drive to achieve and surrender to the ability to receive.
- We choose a gift economy so that everyone can play.
- The Internet is our church, a single meeting place to uplift, inspire and appreciate each other.
- Our mission is to raise the vibration of human consciousness to joy, love, and freedom.
- None of this is serious, it’s all just for fun.
- We say YES!
Do you agree with these principles? If you do, go live them, share them, and celebrate them! Do you have any principles to add, or any changes you would make? Speak loud and proud! Let’s make this life design one we all want to live in together.
Tuesday Tips: 15 Ways to Listen to What Life is Telling You
2012 January 17
Tuesday Tips is a weekly roundup of ideas that feel good. Each week, it gets a little easier to work with the flow of life instead of struggling against it. Give yourself a push downstream by realigning your actions, thoughts, feelings and being with the person you know you are.
1. If you don’t want to do it right now, don’t do it.
Listen to your Self. When you feel a strong aversion to doing things, it’s ok to not do them. Take the time to ponder what you would rather be doing instead, and if at all possible, do that!
2. When the option is to pay-what-you-can, genuinely PAY WHAT YOU CAN.
You will only receive the value you invest. If you think something is worth $1, you’ll get $1 of quality. If you think it’s worth $100, you’ll get that much quality. It’s whatever you want to perceive. So give big and receive big!
3. If you feel bad, exercise.
If you’re bored, exercise. If you want to get high, exercise. If you don’t know how to feel good, exercise. Often we simply have stagnant energy trapped in our bodies that a little movement can shake right out. For an easy but intense at-home workout, try jump rope. It’s just like a flow toy—you can see it illustrate your thoughts. When you stop thinking, the flow will do the jumping for you and it will seem effortless.
4. Set your universal alarm clock.
Set your alarm for the latest you can wake up, but then ask the universe to wake you early, feeling rested. Then you aren’t forcing yourself awake before you’re ready with an alarm, and the perfect timing of life gets a chance to wake you when you’re ready. Or, you’ll get up at the last possible moment, getting plenty of sleep.
5. The flow will lead you to the substance, don’t look to the substance for the flow.
Learn how to feel good without external help. Then when you’re feeling really good and you have the opportunity to partake, you’ll know it’s the right time. You’ll be doing it for fun, not to make yourself feel better.
6. When writing for an audience, write as little as possible.
Condense, distill and clarify your ideas. People want to hear what you have to say, but they simply don’t have time to read five pages of text in one blog post. Good design is what you take away, not what you add.
7. That being said, rewrite your About page!
Crafting an About page for the person you want to be is one of the best ways to become that person. You don’t have to be certain what you want there, you just have to start. Write anything. It will help you know what you want better. Write things the best you can imagine them and then keep going deeper. It can be a total lie in terms of your current reality. Just write it for fun, as if you had what you wanted. “I’m a famous Hollywood actress and I spend my time traveling the world to promote contact juggling” or whatever comes to you. See this article or this one for more details and examples.
8. Say yes.
When you say yes to the things bothering you, you allow them to pass by in the flow. For example: feeling like you ate too much. You can say “No, I ate too much,” essentially focusing on the food in you, making a big deal of it, keeping it in one place, holding onto it like a tree branch while you’re in a raft on a raging river. When you say “Yes, I love food. Yes, I wanted that. Yes, I’m happy to be fed and nourished,” the food can move along in the flow, and say “Well, my job here is done.” It doesn’t bother you, it doesn’t stagnate in your body, it isn’t trapped by your resistant “no.” Just say yes. To everything. It’s all a gift. All of it.
9. Practice the feeling of being recognized.
If you want to be recognized for your work, recognize yourself. Recognize all that you do every day. Recognize the miracle of your life. Recognize the miracle of breath. Recognize all you’ve done so far, how far you’ve come. Recognize what you know: that you are already perfect and you don’t have to do anything to become more whole.
10. Tell yourself “I love you” in the mirror, over and over until you cry.
It’ll feel so good, I promise.
11. Appreciate your job.
If you didn’t have someone else telling you what to do and when to do it, you would have no desire to do anything else. The value of someone else giving you a timeline and schedule is that it forces you to experience contrast, which causes you to have new desires. Use the pressure of time to keep your creative focus.
12. Focus on your breathing.
Like Astrojax, your breath is a flow toy. It is an active illustration of your thoughts. When you focus on your breathing, you are stopping thought, and your breath will make you feel good. When you focus on negativity, your breath will illustrate this by becoming short, rapid, or uncomfortable. You can either change your thoughts (difficult to do!) and watch your breath follow, or you can change your breath (easy to do!) and your thoughts will follow.
13. Let go of your expectations.
Your expectations are what you think is going to happen. But when you let go of your expectations and allow the universe to surprise you, much bigger things than you could ever imagine will occur. Give up the need to know the outcome, and enjoy the Now. Danielle Laporte has a useful prayer for expectation addicts, and a later post wherein she confirms the strategy with “This ‘giving up expectations’ shit really works.” She’s 100% right. Success will come when you least expect it, because it means you’ve released the thought pattern of “I am not successful.”
14. When you are in pain, or overwhelmed with negative thoughts, ask your Self for guidance.
If you are attempting to make a decision to try to feel better (“Will coffee make me feel better? A drink? A smoke? A nap?”), just ask your Self. If you can actually listen to the answer (you will hear it), just say yes. Do whatever your Self says. Your Self always knows what you should do. Just listen and you’ll be on the ride to feeling good again. Whatever your Self tells you to do, your mind will resist. Say yes anyway. Keep saying yes.
15. You can have whatever you want, just listen.
What you project into the world (thoughts, feelings, words and actions) is your vibration, and what you experience as your reality is a physical interpretation of your vibration. When you change the vibration you project, your reality will change to reflect that. Listen to what your reality is telling you. Your reality is reflecting the signal you are projecting, and when you pay attention, you can access the clues life is giving you. Once you learn to read your own vibration by observing your thoughts, emotions and physical world, you can change your vibration, and change your reality. Eventually you’ll be able to play your vibration like a musical instrument, creating your reality in flow just like playing a solo on the guitar.
Why do we drink so much coffee? Most of us may answer something like, “I drink coffee because I don’t have enough time to sleep as much as I should.” Life is too exciting, there’s too much to see, and way too much to do. How can anyone keep up with the speed of business and technology if they sleep 8 hours a night?!
We are so dependent on caffeine because of the limiting beliefs surrounding it. It’s one of those things like deodorant that we just don’t question much because it’s so ingrained in our daily lives. But as I learn to focus on being the Now, I’m realizing I use caffeine and other stimulants because I’m not fully trusting the flow of life to take care of me.
The limiting beliefs of caffeine
1. Without caffeine, I won’t have enough energy to do the things I don’t want to do.
2. Without caffeine, I won’t have enough energy to do the things I DO want to do.
3. Without caffeine, I can’t keep up with everyone else in the business world.
4. Without caffeine, I’ll be in a bad mood because I’ll be tired.
5. Life just isn’t as fun without something outside of me to make me feel good.
Every one of those beliefs is terribly flawed, as I’m sure you can see. I don’t need to get into the why’s—you know that each one of those thoughts is a trained belief that has been installed and perpetuated by our collective society. But what is behind each one of those beliefs? A lack of trust in the process of life.
Life knows the way
The thing about life is that it’s much simpler than we build it up in our minds to be. There is a glue that holds us all together, and that glue communicates with us through our emotions. When we feel good, we’re working with the glue. When we feel bad, we’re struggling against the glue—a hopeless battle. The glue (or flow, or source, or god, etc) always knows what’s up, because the glue IS everything. So when you feel the glue telling you something via your emotions, such as “All I want to do is sleep,” then LISTEN. Don’t drink coffee to battle the glue. It will always fail, and you will continue to feel worse because you aren’t listening to what life is telling you what to do.
Life wants so badly to bring you to the things you want. It doesn’t care what you want, it just wants to co-create with you and flow from here to there. When you listen to your emotions, you are letting life guide you towards what you want.
So right now, life is telling me that I don’t have to skimp on sleep or be hyper on espresso to get what I want. Life will take me to where I want to go in a way that is easiest and most comfortable for me. On the days when it’s important for me to get up early, life will wake me up before my alarm clock. On days when nothing I do could change a thing, life will let me sleep for 12 hours. It’s not my job to decide how much sleep I need. It’s not even my job to set my alarm. If I fully trust the flow of life, the flow of life will take me exactly where I want to go. And I’ll feel so much less cracked-out when I get there.
Note: this article is written to those of us in the throes of caffeine addiction, not casual drinkers. Everything in life is delicious in moderation, it’s only when we begin to rely on things outside of ourselves to feel good that we lose connection to our own internal guidance systems.
The Easiest Meditation in the World, or, How to Cure a Lazy Eye
2012 January 13
The other day, I asked the universe to deliver me a Burning Man world. I just wanted it to be ok for me to sit still and bask in visual hallucinations. I wanted to enjoy just being, while gazing at the ever changing beauty of the Now. Is that so much to ask?! Haha… well, the universe hooked it up as usual.
Yesterday Kelly and I had some time to live before work. As we excitedly browsed strip malls far from our own neighborhood, the flow pulled us into a little store called Kids-N-Cats. Within we found an assortment of treasures, stash boxes and toys. Our one purchase: a Jumbo Glitter Wand Kaleidoscope (similar to this one).
As I gazed through the test model in the store, I knew my desire had manifested. I stared into the tube, transfixed, until we had to leave. Then for another several minutes in the car. Then another 10 once we got home. Then more. Then more. I was addicted!
Kaleidoscope gazing is a form of visual meditation that can pull one instantly into the Now. After my little gazing sessions, when I close my eyes, I can still see the flowing patterns. I’ve never found an easier way to stop thinking, because the view is just too beautiful to be concerned with much else.
Whenever you feel bad or get your feelings hurt, just look into a kaleidoscope and count to ten and you’ll feel better. It’s like a magick wand. It helps you release resistant thoughts, allowing what you want to flow to you.
Kaleidoscope gazing as a cure for Amblyopia (Lazy Eye)
I was born with amblyopia, or a lazy eye. It doesn’t affect my daily life much, but I had to have surgery as a baby and wear glasses through 3rd grade. They even tried to get me to wear an eye patch.
Last night as I looked through the ‘scope with my “good” eye, I physically felt an imbalance—my “bad” eye was basically screaming “let me try it!” I held it up to my right eye, which normally can’t focus on much, and gasped as I began to comprehend what I was seeing. What my left eye makes out as clear shapes of glitter and confetti, my right eye interpreted as fractals. It was as if my right eye was finally seeing the proper “depth” it was tuned to. It made me realize that my developmental “problem” was really just a manifestation of the thought pattern “this reality isn’t deep enough!”
My eye hungrily drank in the flowing fractals, ecstatic to finally see something. I relaxed and basked in the manifestation I’d been wanting for 29 years. And guess what happened? The longer I looked, the clearer the actual shapes in the ‘scope became. My eye was getting stronger by the moment. I can still hardly believe it, but I think I finally found a way to combine the vision of my “normal” eye with the vision of my “screwy” eye (as they called it in middle school!). I never imagined my desire for a “Burning Man world” would manifest in such a monumental manner.
A metaphor for life
Life itself is a kaleidoscope—every moment is beautiful, but you can never hold onto one. It is always flowing, always surprising, and always perfect. Every tiny sparkle and movement is infinitely reflected in dazzling patterns stretching as far as the eye can see. Kaleidoscopes are just another fractal of the universe itself; it’s amazing what simplicity can teach. Thank you, universe.
Below is a brief video of the view through the ‘scope, though it doesn’t come close to the real thing! I highly recommend trying it out for yourself. If you are a “visual” person, this is the magick wand for you. Check it out on Amazon, and if you’d like to support the School of Life Design, please use my affiliate link to make your purchase :]
Tuesday Tips is an assortment of ideas to help us all embrace life a little more each week. Create new habits with the “Doing” section, align your thoughts with love in the “Thinking” portion, explore and control your emotions through “Feeling” and allow yourself to go deeper into “Being”.
1. Spend cash, not credit!
If you rely on credit, you’ll never have to focus enough to pull the cash money through you! Make the jump, cut up your cards and let the universe provide! (GULP!)
2. Share your life.
Online and off, show other people that it’s ok to live like this! It’s ok to be you! It’s ok to be free! It’s ok to feel good! TELL THE WORLD ABOUT HOW AMAZING YOU ARE! The more you do it, the more we all are inspired to do it! Help people see “no one tells her what to do!” The constant positivity accumulates, even if no one ever tells you it does! (Thanks for this one Todd!)
3. Let go of the past.
The School of Life Design group has lots of ideas about how to do it. One of my favorites is Katja‘s suggestion:
I tried hypnotherapy a few years ago, and one of the exercises was one where I met all of my past selves, from age 0 to my age then (23?). Each year was a different me, and I went around to each and every one and looked them in the eye and told them I loved them. Some years didn’t listen, some of them spewed hate at me. But i kept going until all years accepted what I was telling them. It was a really powerful exercise, and I think it could be used to let go of the past in other ways as well…there was another one where I picked a moment when i was little and afraid, and as my present self took myself into my arms and held myself, told her/me it was okay. Sounds weird, maybe, but it was wonderful, too.
4. Picture yourself as the person you will be 50 years from now.
What advice would that person give you?
5. Listen.
Everything in your reality is trying to help you. When people suggest things, or give you feedback, don’t immediately start to poke holes in what they’re saying. Listen, acknowledge their input, and let the idea grow. Don’t kill the idea before it has a chance to see the light of day. Just because you listen, doesn’t mean you’re agreeing! When someone tells you an idea of hers, encourage her in any way you can instead of poking holes. Ideas are like babies, they need love to grow!
6. Practice loving yourself. Never stop.
There are a bunch of ideas in the group, but my favorite is Matthew’s: “Go to a mirror and say, ‘I’m awesome.’ 1000 times straight. After 100, it becomes a trance of its own. The association of the word awesome creates [connection]. Add in any word you like.”
7. Feel good no matter what!
Practice “feeling” yourself into alignment instead of thinking. Thinking about what you want or what you’re grateful for helps you get started, but begin to imagine how you would elevate your mood without thinking about it. At first, it may feel like pushing a boulder uphill with the top of your head. But it works, and I’m looking for ways to make it easier!
8. Visualize yourself allowing.
Whenever I say “I’m allowing,” I picture being in the center of a torus-shaped field of energy entering through the crown of my head and passing out through the bottom of my spine, flowing endlessly. Every time I take the time to visualize this, I instantly feel myself loosen up and the flow of life takes over again. Whatever energy I was blocking with thought begins to move easily. I see that things really are good. Life really is taking care of me.
9. Be in the Now.
As consciousness expands further and further, it’s getting easier to be in the Now. Entheogens and hallucinogens are access points to the Now. Meditation is an access point. Play is an access point. Love is an access point. The most in demand skill of 2012 is the ability to be in the Now. Allow yourself to experience the joy of connection. It’s crazy and weird and deep but most of all it’s just fun. And it feels so good. It’s like becoming lucid in a dream, except it’s real life. We really are this lucky, and life really is this deep.
10. Release your fear of power.
You aren’t alone. We’re all powerful, and we all get to do this together. Hop on over to that (free!) School of Life Design group right now and see how others are releasing their fear and embracing their own power. There is nothing to be afraid of. We all love you.
Today marks the day that I begin my own yoga practice. I’ve taken classes before, and I’ve loved them, but always resisted the cost or found other forms of exercise to pursue.
After asking advice about where to start in the School of Life Design group and then attempting a 20 minute core strength yoga video this morning, I felt excited but unfulfilled. Now what? I returned to the videos that inspired me to try yoga again in the first place: Meghan Currie and Briohny Smyth. The women in the videos are fluid, powerful, and magickal—exactly what I want my practice to be like. But I can’t do a handstand yet, and the videos aren’t exactly instructional. How can I get from beginner to mastery?
I rewatched Meghan’s video again and decided to try just one pose. Then it occurred to me—why can’t I just make up my own yoga routine? I have some experience, I’m already in good shape and I know the poses that I’m excited to try.
So I laid down on the floor and asked my body to tell me what to do. I went through a series of movements that were largely inspired by what I’ve already seen, but that came to me through inspiration instead of memory. It wasn’t easy, and I have a billion new questions and things I want to try, but it felt incredible.
For the first time since being a child, I was exploring my body as a toy. “I wonder what it would feel like if I did this?” and then my body would follow, showing my vision new perspectives and my muscles new ideas.
Doing yoga at home has in the past seemed stressful, boring or too complex to attempt. But now I know that it’s just another way to bask in the joy of having a physical body. After a solid hour of experimentation, I felt like I had made a new friend. My mind joined my body in teamwork at last, and by the end I was crying tears of relief at how grateful I was to my body for exploring with me and taking me new places. My body is not my enemy, or a beast to be tamed. My body is my new best friend and we are going to have so much fun together.
Every single one of us has the power to be the best at whatever we want to do. We all have access to the infinite creative power of the universe, and we all know that deep down, we deserve to shine. But sometimes we doubt our brightness, because we don’t know how to let it out, or we’re afraid of what other people think, or we think no one would want to look anyway.
What is a star?
On one hand, being a star can feel a little too ambitious. The word implies fame, fortune and paparazzi. But wealth and popularity are just side effects of stardom. What being a star actually means is a lot closer to the astronomical, outer space kind of star. It burns brightly. It is immense and radiant. It is a being of light.
You are a being of light. You are made of pure positive energy, of love and joy. It is natural to let that energy flow through you into the world. That’s why you came to this life, to experience the joy of transforming that burning energy into whatever creations you desire.
How do I let myself shine?
You know your inherent value. You know what beauty lies within you. You know that you have something to give to the world. You are unique, and the only one who can see your vision from concept to completion. You no longer have to doubt if you really are special and creative or not—it’s just a fact of life that you are. Here are a few ways to start tapping that infinite reservoir of creative power, so you can begin thinking and feeling like the star you already are.
1. If you don’t know where to start, just ask.
Often we know we have something to offer, but have no idea what that even is. There are a million things to be interested in, how do we choose the right path? If you have no idea what to create or what to do with your life, ask the source of life to show you. There is a glue that holds everything together, and you can call it god, or the flow, or source energy. Whatever you label that force, you can start asking it to help you right now. Just think about exactly what you want, and ask out loud or in your head or in a blog post. Try something like “Life, where should I begin?” Then let the thought go and trust the answer will come. It will.
2. Obsess over your positive qualities.
You can’t feel like a star if you dwell on what you deem to be negative aspects of yourself. You will only find the brightness within you if you give yourself love and make your mind feel safe enough to let the light peek through. When you focus on what you love about yourself, you will attract more things to love. Try making a list of 99 things you love about yourself, or filling out a Daily Self Love worksheet.
3. Focus.
Without focus, your light is diffused. The way to direct your light is by directing your thoughts. The most important thing you can do to focus is think about what you want, all day, every day. Think about what you want for your overall life direction, but also think about what you want in each little segment of your day. How do you want your drive to work to go? What do you want to feel when you wake up? How do you want your trip to the store to turn out? Focusing on what you want is the only way to get what you want.
When you don’t know what you want, or you find it hard to focus on anything but what you don’t want, the solution is simple: stop thinking. Any thoughts contrary to what you want will only negate the desire you’ve been focusing on. The easiest way I’ve found to stop thinking is silent counting, but you can also use exercise, meditation, or playing with flow toys to name a few.
4. Let go.
Feeling like the star you are will only come with practice, but don’t take it too seriously. Be easy on yourself. If you want to shine, you will. Trust that the universe will help you. Trust that the solution will come. Love yourself and think about what you want, but remember that this is supposed to be fun. Letting your natural light shine should feel easy. When you are in the flow, co-creating with god, you’ll know because it will feel effortless. That is what being a star is all about—life provides the energy, and you get to direct where it goes.
Note: the image in this article is not mine, but I’d love to know who made it! If you have any leads, please let me know!
Tuesday Tips: 13 Ways to Stay Caught Up in the Flow of 2012
2012 January 3
Tuesday Tips is a weekly collection of shortcuts to feeling good. Explore ways to harness your creative power by taking action, directing your thoughts, practicing feeling the way you want to feel, and stopping thought altogether to let your natural state of well being shine.
1. Rearrange the energy in your home for major manifestations.
Bring about big change by optimizing your living area. Donate or sell as many possessions as you can, clean up all the dust bunnies, and clear out big spaces to move in. Kelly and I finally cleared out our living room to be a gallery space and play room, which at long last gave us an excuse to record another Astrojax video.
2. Take as many photos as possible to find the gems.
Great photographers aren’t great because they take the perfect shot every time; they succeed because they take so many photos. Next time you take your digital camera out for a stroll, resolve to fill your memory card. The more photos you take, the more diamonds you find. On Christmas Kelly and I took 378 photos but only 16 made the cut.
3. Just start saying things are how you want them to be.
Eventually, I promise you, they will be. But you have to start telling the story now. If you want something, just say you have it already. Your mind is easily fooled.
4. Does anything else in your life feel like…?
I’ve mentioned this before, and it’s worth discussing again. Whenever you hear someone complaining of a malady or circumstance, ask her if anything else in her life feels the same way. She may be surprised at your question, but it will definitely get her thinking. Whatever emotion we feel is reflected back to us in every area of our lives, so when you feel irritation, you are likely thinking irritating thoughts about other things.
5. Don’t second guess your decisions.
After you make a decision (for example, a Facebook status update), don’t overthink it. Instead of thinking “should I have posted that?” think “I am so happy I did that.” Put your mind at ease!
6. Write a bucket list.
I made a list of things I want to do before I die. It really helped me figure out exactly what I want. You can only get what you want if you know what you want!
7. Create your Master Mind Group.
In Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill suggests creating a Master Mind Group, a committee of advisors to consult on business and life decisions. The group can be people you already know, celebrities, or dead people. Whenever you make a business decision, picture asking your committee their opinion. What would your mentors, muses and inspirations tell you to do? It can often help you gain confidence in decision-making. My committee? Nicki Minaj, Lil Wayne, and Drake!
8. Practice the feeling of strength.
We have one of those pull up bars that goes over a door frame, and Kelly started adding one pull up each day to her routine. She must be on 10 or so right now, and it inspired me to try pull ups myself. I’m still working on managing one, but I try to do one more “attempt” every day. The feeling of aching muscles reminds your mind of your strength, which carries over into other areas of your life.
9. Be your own #1 fan.
When I was feeling rather critical of myself, I asked Kelly what I should do. She suggested “being my own #1 fan.” She said to picture all the people who love and admire me, and imagine what they would say. No one else would ever be so harsh on me! Keep your perspective of the bigger picture by remembering that you truly are perfect the way you are. You can’t scrutinize every brush stroke in a painting as it’s being painted; often the strokes that look the most awkward turn out to be the happiest accidents. Try not to criticize tiny details, because the bigger picture of you is already perfect. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s all you can do.
10. Send your thank you cards!
Feel the feeling of getting the gift again, practice the feeling of gratitude, ensure future gifts!
11. Pretend you’re in Vegas.
When Kelly and I visited Vegas, we allowed ourselves to completely follow our intuition. We abandoned all plans and notions of what we should do, and let our feelings guide us. Every decision had to be a “fuck yeah!!” or it was a “hell no!” I want to live my whole life that way!
12. Meditate, don’t medicate.
The other day, I had a freaky asthma flare up that had me in a bit of a panic. I had no inhaler or other medication, and it was the middle of the night. Kelly had us meditate and after a few minutes of focused breathing, my symptoms began to subside. I know in my heart the breathing difficulties are just me feeling like I can’t catch my breath in general—2012 is moving so fast! The more I let my mind rest, the easier it is to stay in the flow.
13. Allow.
Stop resisting and begin allowing. At any point say “I’m allowing this,” or “I allow myself to feel good.” Anything you want, just say you allow it. I allow well being. I allow myself to feel the way I want to feel. I allow myself to nap. I allow myself to rest. I allow myself to feel good anyway. I allow that person to live their life the way they want. I allow myself to relax. I allow this moment to feel good. I allow myself to receive the gifts the universe is trying to give me. I allow myself to have what I want. It feels so much better to allow than resist, and when you say yes to the life around you, the life around you says yes to you.
