Lesson 4: Designing Daily Life

 2010 September 21
by jessica mullen   22 Comments 

now!
thanks: szeke | iPhone wallpaper

Like graphic design, you only get better at life design if you practice. Often in graphic design courses, an instructor will assign a “daily practice,” where you pick one creative activity to do every single day for a semester. (One semester I added a self portrait every day to the DND365 group. Another semester I created one 12seconds video a day.) The point is to make creativity a habit, but also to facilitate breakthroughs that can only come from doing the same damn thing over and over until you find a way to make it exciting again. In life design, our daily practice is picking a few activities to do every single day to keep the good-feeling thoughts flowing.

It’s fun to learn to direct your thoughts. It’s a shortcut to getting what you want out of life! This lesson will help you practice thinking good-feeling thoughts until it is a natural habit. Habits take about 30 days to form, so give yourself time. Accept that you won’t be able to change your thought patterns immediately. And remember that each passing moment can be a fresh start. Why not choose now to start feeling better?

FEEL GOOD NOW.

If you aren’t feeling good at this moment, do something to feel good. NOW. This lesson will suck to read if you aren’t already feeling good.

99 WAYS TO FEEL GOOD

  1. Smoke something.
  2. Drink a polar pop.
  3. Sign up for a half-marathon.
  4. Pet your kitty. Literally or euphemistically.
  5. Watch an episode of The Popular Podcast.
  6. Meditate.
  7. Get a backrub.
  8. Give a backrub.
  9. Think about how you felt during your favorite class in high school. Mine was driver’s ed!
  10. Put on your lucky bathing suit. Don’t have one? The one you have already is.
  11. Listen to or read your favorite motivational speaker. I like Jerry & Esther, Steve, and Gala the best.
  12. Burn a CD for a friend.
  13. Burn a DVD for a friend.
  14. Doodle in your sketchbook.
  15. Write a rampage of appreciation.
  16. Write a post about the things you’re grateful for.
  17. Make yourself a raw vegan meal.
  18. Do 10 pushups.
  19. Jog a mile.
  20. Look at I Can Has Cheezburger
  21. Write a list of all the things you want & concentrate on the feeling each one would give you if you already had it.
  22. Call a friend.
  23. Facebook message everyone you would like to keep in touch with. If that’s too many people, make a list of all them and write to as many of them as you can. Save the list as an email draft and return to it the next time you’re inspired to.
  24. Play online poker.
  25. Look at Lookbook.
  26. Look at ONTD.
  27. Look at Boing Boing.
  28. Read a book.
  29. Paint your nails.
  30. Go for a swim.
  31. Sit out in the sun.
  32. Listen to Calle 13.
  33. Listen to some dubstep & dance.
  34. Look up the translation of your favorite non-English song.
  35. Think about thunderstorms & rollercoasters.
  36. Look around you & note everything you like about it.
  37. Put on some gold jewelry.
  38. Dye your hair.
  39. Cut your hair.
  40. Change your bedsheets.
  41. Make yourself a magick wand.
  42. Bead yourself some jewelry.
  43. Drink coffee.
  44. Drink an energy drink.
  45. Deliberately take 20 deep-as-possible breaths.
  46. Set up auto-pay on one of your bills.
  47. Read Think & Grow Rich.
  48. Watch The Secret.
  49. Watch What the Bleep Do We Know!?
  50. Record a video of yourself smiling.
  51. Run as fast as you can.
  52. Give yourself permission to stay up all night.
  53. Do yoga.
  54. Rub your temples.
  55. Rub your eyes.
  56. Give yourself a tarot reading. Reading the cards can give you a new perspective on your experiences. It’s like asking your higher self for advice. And don’t be afraid of doing it wrong! Any card you draw can be enlightening if approached with a positive attitude.
  57. Start a website.
  58. Work on your website for 5 minutes.
  59. Take a shower.
  60. Mod a tshirt.
  61. Play a Pandora station someone else suggested.
  62. Play your favorite Pandora station.
  63. Put your headphones on and picture your life as a movie with a great soundtrack.
  64. Smile.
  65. Pierce something.
  66. Smell you favorite perfume.
  67. Light some incense.
  68. Take a nap. I had to do this one in the middle of writing this post!
  69. Call your sibling.
  70. Think of your favorite birthday present ever.
  71. Read about DMT.
  72. Do the dishes.
  73. Have a drink.
  74. Finish this thought a few times: “Wouldn’t it be nice if…”
  75. Read the bio of a musician you love.
  76. Think about fresh starts: beginning undergrad, starting a new project, a new school year, a new sketchbook, a new friend, a new home, a new morning.
  77. Start a vision board.
  78. Jump on a trampoline.
  79. Play a videogame.
  80. Go on a roadtrip.
  81. Take photos of all the beauty around you.
  82. Take sexy photos of yourself.
  83. Remember the first time you got in trouble with a friend. I was caught behaving indecently with a boy in second grade!
  84. Do handstands.
  85. Remember how you felt when you wrote your first love letters.
  86. Write a love letter. I know this one works, because I just wrote one to Kelly to test it. Here’s what I wrote, on the back of a piece of car insurance paper on my desk:
    photo76
    When I gave it to her, “our song” came on Pandora. I started crying! I could not have planned the moment better. I didn’t have to. I’m a good life designer!

    As I went to link “our song”, I had to watch the video. And guess what? I have the exact same haircut as Cyndi Lauper! Feeling good gives you mind-blowing synchronicities.

  87. Enter a contest.
  88. Buy a lottery ticket.
  89. Eat a lot of something low calorie, like apples or kale chips or sugar-free jello.
  90. Carve a pumpkin.
  91. Play an instrument.
  92. Think of yourself as easily tuning your body to a better-feeling vibration, like you would a radio dial.
  93. Sing.
  94. Make a fort.
  95. Shave your cho-cha.
  96. Look at kids and wonder what they know that you forgot.
  97. Make a list of all things you like about someone you hate.
  98. Mail someone a gift.
  99. Tell someone you love them. And mean it.

Are you feeling good now? Yes? Now you’re ready to learn. Let’s do this. YOUR MIND IS YOUR BITCH.

Review

Lesson 1: Introduction to Life Design introduces the practice of shaping your reality into specific, desired experiences. Lesson 2: Designing the Digital You discusses using a personal website to help design your life. Lesson 3: Designing Thoughts and Emotions explains the conceptual basis of thought design. This lesson is about practicing feeling good every single day.

The goal of this lesson is to make the conscious designing of your life experience a lasting lifestyle change. You really can practice feeling good. Having a website can help you improve even faster!

Get what you want by feeling good

You like the feeling you get when you think about why you like something, because you are deliberately making yourself vibrate at a higher emotional level. The more you think positively, the better you feel. The better you feel, the more inspired your actions are. The more inspired your actions are, the more you allow the universe to orchestrate things on your behalf. When you allow the universe to work for you, the closer you get towards the things you desire.

The Law of Attraction says what you think about, you bring about. This is because when you think a thought, you feel an emotion. That emotion is a vibrational signal to the universe to bring more of that vibration. Your next thought is then born out of that emotion/vibration, and that thought will likely cause you to feel the same emotion and emit more of the same vibration.

Your emotions are like magnets, attracting thoughts that bring you similar feelings. When you think a thought that feels good, you are creating an environment in your mind for more good-feeling thoughts. When you feel good, the universe brings you more thoughts that feel good. It does that by placing in your path things that you desire, as well as things you haven’t thought to desire yet, but which bring you similar good feelings. This is how you get what you want by feeling good.

Get in the vortex

Abraham calls the following feelings being in the vortex: Joy, Appreciation, Empowered, Freedom, & Love. These emotions are at the top of the emotional guidance scale. When you feel these emotions, you are generating thoughts that are pure positivity. These thoughts bring you more positive emotions, which bring you more positive thoughts. When you feel these emotions, you attract more of the same. The point of life is to feel these emotions. When you feel such positive emotions, you allow good things to come into your reality. All of the money, the power, the love, all comes flowing to you when your emotional vibration is consistently high. But the point isn’t to feel these emotions to manifest material possessions into your life, the point is that it feels good to feel joy, and love, and freedom!

A simpler way to put it is that when you feel joyful, you make the right decisions. You trust your inspiration, you’re eager to try new things, and you are excited to have positive interactions with people. When you feel joyful, and intentionally remain feeling joyful, the Law of Attraction brings you more joy.

Start your daily practice now

It’s easy to say you’ll start directing your thoughts and thinking positively, but sometimes it can be harder to put into practice. I’ve found that consistently doing a few simple activities each day is a great way to build momentum.

Use one of the following lists depending on your waking mood. If you feel crappy, it’s easy to get wrapped up in negative thoughts your entire day. But if you do one simple action to alter the direction of your thoughts, your day can be magickally transformed.

Novice (i.e., crankypants):

  1. First, whatever you’re feeling cranky about, say in response, “FUCK IT.” You’ll instantly feel better.
  2. Write down a list of things you’re grateful for, first thing when you wake up. That’s all. See how it affects your mood.

Beginner (feeling ho-hum):

  1. Write down a list of things you’re grateful for.
  2. Meditate for 10 minutes. Notice how you feel after.

Intermediate (I’m feeling pretty good):

  1. Write down a list of things you’re grateful for.
  2. Write down your intentions for the day (I will manifest $20. I will enjoy my friends’ company. I will eat well.)
  3. Meditate for 15 minutes.
  4. Go for a 3 mile walk. Notice how you feel after this!

Advanced (I feel great!):

  1. Write down a list of things you’re grateful for. Think about how each one makes you feel and why.
  2. Write down your intentions for the day.
  3. Meditate for 15 minutes.
  4. Go for a 3-6 mile walk.
  5. Practice segment intending. When you enter a new segment of your life (a phone call, a meal, a drive, a walk, a shower, etc), pause for a moment and focus your thoughts on how you would like the segment to play out. By intentionally choosing what you want to happen, you can begin to influence how events unfold. By getting in the emotion of how you would feel if things did play out the way you want them, you are attracting more of that exact feeling.
  6. Milk your good feelings. Bask in how good you feel. Write about it. Go on a rampage of appreciation.

Lifestreamer (I feel great & I’m not afraid to tell the world!):

  1. Write a post of things you’re grateful for.
  2. Write a post of your intentions for the day.
  3. Take a photo of yourself meditating.
  4. Map your exercise with Runkeeper. Bonus points for making a video of your adventure!
  5. Before each segment in your day, publish a photo with a title of how you want the segment to go.
  6. Write a rampage of appreciation post. (If you want to write all these posts but not feature them on the front page of your blog, try filtering them like I do with a WordPress plugin like RYO Category Visibility.)

Some days you’ll wake up feeling like a novice. Some days you’ll wake up feeling so good you won’t need any list! The point of doing a regimen each day, no matter how you feel, is to practice strengthening your brain muscle. You have to work it out each day, just like you would any other muscle you’re trying to build up.

All that matters is that you find something that makes you feel good, and you make a habit of it. Don’t feel bad if you skip a day, but remember that only you can decide to feel better. Relying on external things to make yourself feel good (like alcohol, a relationship, or food) doesn’t work very well. Being drunk all the time is just messy, eating to excess feels terrible, and what happens when your relationship isn’t going the way you want it? You allow someone else to control your mood, when it’s much easier and satisfying to learn to control your own mood.

Throughout the rest of your day

Breathe deeply. I have to remind myself of this all day. It helps.

Think about what you want, not what you don’t want. Drink water. Smile. Be nice to yourself. Say “fuck it” a lot. Notice the things around you that you like. Ignore the things you don’t. Don’t watch the news. Don’t let other people determine your mood. Don’t let them scare you or intimidate you or piss you off. Only you can control your reality, so start doing it!

Before bed

What you do in the morning can affect your whole day. But how you feel before you go to sleep at night is just as important. The emotion you feel before you go to sleep is often exactly where you’ll wake up, so make sure you feel good before you fall asleep.

Kelly and I played the Alphabet game before we went to sleep the other night. The Alphabet game (another Abraham process) is where you start with the letter A and think of a few words that make you feel good. Alignment, allowing, alive… then move on to B. Basking, beautiful, breathtaking… Then C: caring, camping, colorful. And so on.

I was SO CRABBY and did not know what to do with myself. So Kel came in and gave me a backrub, then talked me into playing the alphabet game. By the time we made it to N, it totally calmed my mind and made me super sleepy. Then I woke up feeling awesome the next morning!

Keep track of your manifestations

On a recent episode of TPP, Allison suggested using a spreadsheet to keep track of your manifestations. Feeling good is the main point to all this, but once you feel good, it’s time to start thinking about what you want!

Thinking about specific things you desire, then paying attention to how you feel when you imagine them, is one way to bring those things closer to you. When you set intentions in daily blog posts, spend some time with each intention. Say you want to manifest $20. Write it down, then spend a minute thinking about how you’ll come across that money. Picture finding a $20 bill in the street. Imagine receiving a $20 Paypal donation. Savor how good it feels when something like that happens! If it’s important to you to keep track, log the intention in your spreadsheet and return to it to record the manifestation.

In case of emergency

When I was feeling down the other night, Kelly came in and read me something she had just written. She calls it an affirmation meditation. As she read it, her soothing, authoritative voice started making me feel so much better. I asked her to read it again! She recorded it to share with everyone. Take a listen when you need a boost!

Another track Kel and I have been listening to a lot lately is Abraham’s Rampage of Wellbeing. This 11 minute treat explains a lot about how feeling good works.

If you’re feeling bad

First, say FUCK IT! Who cares? What does it matter, really? There are so many other things to be thinking about!

Does talking to that one friend always bring you down? Then stop talking to her! Does watching TV leave you feeling sick and junk foody? Destroy your television! Try to completely remove anything in your life that feels bad.

If nothing else is working, cheat! Do anything you can to start feeling better. If I’m bored, the best thing I can do is exercise. If I’m irritable, the best thing I can do is meditate. If I’m tired, I take a nap. Try to avoid things that make you feel guilty while you’re doing them, like overeating.

Alcohol and drugs can help you up the emotional scale, but are only temporary fixes. You don’t need me to tell you that you don’t want to depend on them to get you happy.

I know this shit can be extremely annoying if you’re not already feeling pretty good. If you’re feeling a negative emotion and this post is making you gag, then just acknowledge that only you have the power to control how you feel. And since you have that power, you can choose to feel something different. You might not feel like doing that right now, but just knowing that it is within your power can be enough to feel a little better.

Magickal is the new normal

Now that you’re working on feeling good, take care to stay that way! Think of building up your positive thinking faculties as working on your magick powers. By directing your thoughts (or your focus, or energy) towards the things you want, and towards feeling good, you are actively manipulating your reality to become more of what you want.

Practicing feeling good every single day will turn your life inside out, in the best way possible. All you have to do is make a new habit of thinking good-feeling thoughts. It’s that simple.

Abraham calls the act of getting joyful before acting lining up energy. You can think of it like casting a spell. Before you can expect to sway a situation, you need to have power. And your power comes from your emotions. When you take the time to feel joyful, you are lining up your energy–or building your magick powers. The more joyful you are, the more powerful you are. Neat, right?

If you’re ever in doubt about the true nature of reality and if this is all worth your time, do some research into entheogens. When you realize that your mind has the power to make you see completely alternate realities with the ingestion of a simple chemical, playing with your mind becomes a lot more intriguing. Life is the trip. Sometimes it just takes a different perspective to make you realize how crazy (and fun!) reality truly is. Also, entheogens can have mad healing powers, especially for those with cancer.

Enjoy the fruits of your labor

When you are in a joyful state (or in the vortex), observe the synchronicities happening all around you. Observe all the intentions you put into place that are unfolding before your eyes. Everything in your reality was at one point just a thought in your mind. Remember wanting to get the job you now have? Remember wanting the home you live in? Remember wanting the relationship you have? You manifested all the good things in your life, they were not accidents.

Activity

I want to know what makes you feel good, so I can try it! Often, something will work a few times but then lose it’s flavor, so I’m always looking for new ideas. Please add something that makes you feel good to the list at the top of this post. Add it in the comments here or make a list on your own site and link to it (then we can all peep your new site!).

To go deeper into this lesson, don’t forget to listen to the discussion MP3. Kelly and I give a lot of personal examples of how we’ve been applying these ideas to our own lives. It’s a really good one, almost an hour long!

See you next time!

Lesson 5 is Designing Your Environment. This lesson will be all about figuring out your preferences in life and transforming your environment to match them. We’ll talk about vision boards, living spaces, digital spaces and learning to say no to things you don’t want.

Be sure to sign up for the School of Life Design Mailing List to get emails when new lessons go up, and to get exclusive content not available to the public.

Thank you!

Designing life wouldn’t be nearly as fun without you! If you enjoyed this lesson, please consider a donation to keep the School of Life Design thriving.


Thank you for co-creating with me!



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  1. Allison permalink
    September 21, 2010

    I feel good when I:

    -See that somebody mentions me in a post! 8D Heehee.
    -Watch a TED talk. http://www.ted.com/
    -See beautiful images on Tumblr.
    -Blow bubbles.
    -Take photos of beautiful things I see around me.
    -Discover something that can make my life easier! (Like a grocery delivery service or a chore-doing robot.)
    -Read about the latest advances in technology. http://www.kurzweilai.net/blog (Never ceases to amaze me! And gets me so excited for all of the wonderful things that are coming!)

    Thanks for Lesson 4!

  2. September 21, 2010

    I ended up giving my list a page on my site ==> http://wp.me/PRQQO-6c

    Loved the lesson!

  3. September 22, 2010

    Super stoked about this. Made sure I felt better before I read and it seriously helped my mood!

    I really like to read something inspiring when I’m feeling shitty. Also yelling out my rampages! <3 doing that!

  4. September 22, 2010

    Oh shit I forgot to ask a question!

    Jessica where did you learn the meanings for Tarot cards? I have a set and want to learn more about it!

  5. jessica mullen permalink*
    September 23, 2010

    Allison, your list is so delightful! I can totally get into all of those! Ha but I think I watched all the TED talks I was interested in… but I’m sure they’ve posted more since then. Taking photos of beauty around you is perfect! I also like videoing… and I definitely just subscribed to Kurzweil’s blog. Kurzweil drove a lot of my work in grad school, thanks for the inspiration reminder!

    Ayanna, your list is delightful! You’re so making me want to learn how to hoop! Hooping to dubstep sounds so dreamy. Thank you so much for sharing the link!

    Emma, that is super cool that you made sure you felt good before reading… yay it worked! And about tarot… my favorite book to learn from was this: http://www.amazon.com/Tarot-Your-Self-Mary-Greer/dp/0878770771

    I also really like using the card meanings here: http://learntarot.com/cards.htm

    Those are great places to start. The most important thing is learning what the cards mean to YOU, there is no right or wrong way to do it. But learning the traditional meanings first gives you a great place to start thinking about how they resonate with you.

  6. October 13, 2010

    The first thing that makes me happy: serendipity. I got the email for this back when it posted, but I was substitute teaching and you’re blocked by the content filter! (Something about profanity. But then, that same filter blocks a handful of astrology blogs for “alternative lifestyle,” so who the heck knows what that’s about?) Anyhow, I just read this post when I received the email for the newest lesson – and I’d just posted my own list of ways to cheer yourself up on my blog! Serendipity!

    One thing that somehow missed my list: Going to bed with a sleep mask on. I don’t usually wear them, because it makes it hard for me to wake up in the morning, but it’s a lovely sort of sensory deprivation that makes my sleep that much deeper.

    Also, anything in the kitchen unless it’s cleaning. Cooking and baking make me feel wonderful.

  7. jessica mullen permalink*
    October 14, 2010

    Nicalyse,
    blocked by the content filter, oh no! I guess there might be a few too many f-bombs on this site… oops ;]

    I love serendipity too! Isn’t it awesome how information always comes at exactly the right times? Thanks for sharing your list!

  8. November 15, 2010

    Aww! this list is amazing. It’s so positive and helpful, thank you!!!! <3

  9. February 24, 2011

    I love the list! I printed it out to hang in my bathroom (where it will undoubtedly get the most views). I am also working on my morning schedule. Overall I am very happy with where I am right now and I ultimately have you two lovely ladies to thank. I have been in the vortex all day and it feels so freakin’ amazing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I am grateful. I am grateful. I am grateful.

  10. jessica mullen permalink*
    February 24, 2011

    Thanks Elisha! A morning routine can be so helpful. I don’t really follow a specific order or timing anymore, and a lot of the writing suggestions are now all wrapped up into my gathering momentum posts. BUT what I do make sure is that I exercise and meditate every day along with posting, those three things are all I need to keep sane!

  11. March 2, 2011

    Oh yeah, I forgot to add something to your list. One thing I do when I want to feel good is sing. I don’t care too much for my voice so I usually sing along with my favorite CD or playlist. I’m too shy to sing loudly in front of people so my car is my stage. I love taking a drive through the backroads, cranking up my stereo (it gets loud) and sing until my heart’s content. Just thought I’d share. :) Have a lovely day.

  12. March 6, 2011

    That’s a great one Elisha – I think it must have to do with vibration. By singing along with music that feels good, you’re raising your vibration because you’re literally matching the vibration of something that feels good. How cool! It’s like an impersonation, putting yourself in the feeling place of the feeling you want…

  13. jennifer galick permalink
    April 12, 2011

    Caring for animals makes me feel good. Knowing that I’ve made a real positive change in their lives is the most rewarding thing you can do. Also, I have had the experience of being filled with source energy or my higher self, whatever you want to call it, believe me you don’t have to work at feeling good when you are in that state. It is a place of no fear, no lack, no disease, just feeling. Your feelings are actually palpable, more real than anything else and of course they do feel good.

    After having that short lived experience, it is most difficult to really feel good as compared to that anything else pales by comparison.

  14. April 12, 2011

    Hi Jennifer! The good news is that once you do it once, you know you can do it again. And it gets easier and easier every time. Thank you for sharing!

  15. Jesslyn Littlepage permalink
    June 1, 2011

    Things that make me feel good:
    -Brushing my kittens
    -Being the big spoon
    -Going home (to my burning family)
    -Taking pictures of me swinging my wildly colored hair around like a wild woman
    -Doing a shot of Bragg’s Apple Cider Vinegar
    -Checking items off my “to do” list

    Jessica, I love the “pick your level” morning routines. That’s just what I need. I’ve been practicing positivity by distracting myself whenever I get whiny or down. My sweetie and I will each list 5 things we’re grateful for and 3 positive actions we’ll take today whenever one of our moods starts to wan. Then throughout the day if we see a bad mood on the rise, we look to see if we’ve been working on our positive actions or if there is something we could do right then toward them. Now I’m going to add this morning routine to my daily plan. Thanks!

  16. June 6, 2011

    Jesslyn, brushing kittens is the best!!! I love your list!!

    Excellent idea on listing things you’re grateful for & what positive actions you’ll take. Whenever Kelly or I notice our mood dropping (or we’re super tired), we’ll ask “what are you grateful for?” or “what do you want?” It works every time.

    Thanks for the comment darlin!!!! <3

  17. July 19, 2011

    I made a full 99 item list, it is here http://godsocks.blogspot.com/2011/07/99-ways-to-feel-good.html

    Thanks for the great lessons you two!

  18. July 20, 2011

    Hey Jessica!

    It looks like you don’t really use blogspot so I came back here to answer your question. Square breathing is when you inhale for four counts, hold for four, breathe out for four counts and then hold there, empty, for four counts.
    But just today I read that you should hold your breath four times as long as you inhaled for and breathe out twice as long as you inhaled for. [Unlimited Power by Anthony Robbins, heard about it on Steve Pavlina's site and he's totally talking about LoA without calling it that in this book!]

    Thanks for your comment ^_^

  19. April 5, 2013

    One thing that works particularly well for when I’m feeling tired and grumpy is to curl up on the couch with my boyfriend and some snacks and read through the various Damn You Autocorrect lists. Or Engrish dot com. So good!

    In response to what you were saying, Jessica, about why someone who practices LOA might want to pay attention to world events I’m curious– what do you believe is the purpose of contrast?

    Here’s where I’m at on the topic. Let’s back up to the nature of my mind: I perceive an event, my beliefs about the event kick in, and I have an emotional response to those beliefs. If I don’t like the event, I have a negative response. Now, as someone who is practicing consciously creating my reality, the challenge is to examine my entire reaction chain (the emotions, the beliefs, the events) and figure out why everything happened. Where is the point of dissonance? Is my emotion disproportionate? I need to meditate. Is my belief incorrect? I need to study. Is the event destructive or causing someone pain? I need to either remove myself from the situation or correct it. Then I can take that new understanding into the future and do something about it to break my thought habits. Contrast, used consciously, is very empowering.

    Now I think learning about global events can be helpful in that doing so can present new experiences of contrast and thus help you raise your consciousness. For example, I ate meat my entire life until I was 22. I never once considered becoming a vegetarian, even though many of my good friends were. And then when I was 22, I fell in love with my boyfriend, a vegan. He gradually exposed me to the reality of meat consumption– the factory farms, the environmental destruction, cancer, the emotional toll on humans and animals alike, everything. And every time I learned about one of these horrifying new realities, I was outraged, and then disgusted, and then sooooo sad, but at the end of the day– my dietary choices were increasingly peaceful, healthy, and creative. And my pleasure in spending time with animals increased. And more animals are alive because I didn’t eat them, and there’s that much more of my $$$ in the pockets of some organic vegetable farmers. That process took some painful reality checks! I could’ve “stayed happy” eating bacon egg and cheese bagels, not knowing the reality behind what I was eating, but I’m so glad to have gone through those negative emotions, because they fueled my growth. My capacity for pleasure and joy and peace have increased because I know I’m doing the best I can do as a human being in California in 2013 to treat the planet and all its creatures with love.

    So the point I’m trying to make is– yeah, I want to feel blissful, but I think consistently aiming towards greater consciousness necessarily involves some pain, and I shouldn’t necessarily resist that. Not that I’m seeking out pain for the sake of pain– I seek out truth first, and that often leads to happiness, but I’m okay with pain temporarily if it’s helping me make better decisions.

    All that said, I do make an effort to protect and be aware of my emotional state. I’m highly sensitive, an introvert, and relatively new to consciously creating, and I’m not trying to be Superwoman. Sometimes (a lot of the time) I really need to withdraw into my bubble and turn off all the media and technology and do some self-involved things to recharge, because too much emotional turbulence can be counter-productive.

    Does any of this make sense?

  20. April 5, 2013

    I thought of another example. Why it might be good to keep up with “The News” *specifically* is that you might learn something new and experience contrast that might take you down a wormhole of life that you didn’t even know was possible! Like when I found out that sex trafficking was a problem, I was really upset (cue bitter laughter for understatement of the century). But then my friends and I teamed up to host a mindblowing fundraiser drag-queen mud wrestling party in a fucking mansion that raised a bunch of money for sex trafficking survivors! Soooo that’s why I watch the news (sometimes, when I’m feeling tough enough). Do you see what I’m saying?

    Love your work, Jessica! Thank you!

  21. April 7, 2013

    Hi Kiriko,
    We came to this reality to experience contrast so we can discern preferences and then experience the manifestation of our desires. No matter how big or small the contrast is, it’s valuable.

    In regards to the news, once I had enough, I was done with it. There was not a single drop of bad news I wanted to hear more of. Abraham-Hicks always says to straight ignore it – but I think they say it so that we can finally feel some relief. The attention to what we don’t want is still valuable – it creates the opposite side of the wave, the solution. But you don’t have to keep experiencing the same painful contrast for the greater good of the world.

    The more one can turn their attention away from what’s “going wrong” the more will go right in one’s life. Everyone is here for their own adventure, and just because one person turns away doesn’t mean anything for the rest of the population.

    All contrast creates solutions, so I think the key is to live the contrast, make peace with it, and allow the solution to come. It’s like surfing, riding the waves. Being able to feel good in spite of contrast is my ultimate goal – feeling good no matter what, rolling with the punches, etc.

    But anything in the world that one pushes against (protests, fights, etc) will only grow bigger. What we resist persists. What we focus on expands.

    What do you think?
    Thanks for the great conversation!!! <3

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