Flow Toys, Entheogens & Presence

 2014 October 6
by jessica mullen   Comments Off 

Cam

I get so mad at my hoop
TEACH ME THINGS! I want to scream,
Like how astrojax felt on that one new year’s on acid, how it talked to my body so effortlessly

And yet it is not the hoop not teaching me
it is me leaving the TextEdit window to start pandora
but then I don’t want to listen to something with words
bc writing

so I distract myself over and over
today I discovered how much i actually think
it’s so much
it’s all the time

but every day i become more conscious and i explore my mantras and once in a great while i place my singular focus upon my breath and
HOLY SHIT
there is a whole other dimension there
there is a world
beyond thought
beyond words

there is a world that i was introduced to with entheogens
and yes i did see god
so many times
the first trip, “WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME? I HAD NO IDEA”

i am addicted to opening my mind
i am compelled to see how deep life can get
drugs took me there
(but you know religion
then meditation
took you first
)
i can get there with my own breath now
meditation
and exercise
and mantras
and hoops!

oh yeah back to the hoop

so i try to remind myself, making awkward hoop video after awkward hoop video, that i should just play with the hoop
just be there with the hoop

that trip with the astrojax taught me that the flow toy
is an extension of self
it’s alive
you can make it come alive
like real live magic
it’s like this extension of your pineal gland
a black light, spinal looking energy that comes the fuck AWAKE in your hands

i looked at my cat after seeing this energy crawl down his arms, thought about how she was organic matter, a single expression of the flow, a dance that will come to an end

this energy
it was the thing animating the dance
the thing that came to play
the spirit
alone
by itself

personified/drawn out by astrojax and visual trails

so i ask my hoop
please tell me something
please teach my body

because i realize how painfully out of the present i am
every time i get present for one second i think “ok…”
then try to rationalize/explain/figure out how i was able to be present for that second

you think about it and you lose it
it
can’t be
thought
about

so i want to go back to my breath but then what do i say
i remember i must do simran (repeat a mantra over and over forever)
but they are all words
i remember reading about someone’s (david cain?) technique for being present on a walk home
NO WORDS

just be without words

so i remember i can feel my breath on the tip of my nose
but i have to do that with my eyes closed

OK AND THANK YOU THAT IS WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR
i will try hooping with my eyes closed
and feel my breath go in and out at a single point on my nostril

i asked for the hoop to tell me something

and it did

magick is flowing through me today

Tuesday Tips: 9 Ways to Blossom Right Now

 2014 April 8
by jessica mullen   Comments Off 

Seed of life

Welcome to Tuesday Tips, the weekly digest of life design tricks and techniques. All of my suggestions come down to practicing the same idea: don’t worry, be happy! As Alan Watts says, “Basically, there is simply nothing to worry about, because you yourself are the eternal energy of the universe.”

Doing

1. Make art just to make art.
What if you could make any art you wanted, but couldn’t share it online? Is it still worth making if you can’t get likes and favs on it? Try creating something for the pure pleasure of it. Imagine the act of you making art as a one person show with a one person audience–you.

2. Make your art better.
When I was a kid, I would frequently win the coloring contests at my local grocery store. My secret was simple: just use something a little more creative than crayons. Cotton balls for clouds and bunny tails always seemed to do the trick. When making your own art, ask yourself, “How could I win the coloring contest?” Inspiration will come.

Thinking

3. Try this mantra: “I love myself, right now.”
I made a nice meditation about this one. If you can repeat it over and over eventually you’ll train your mind into manifesting circumstances in which you actually do love yourself right now. It’s really neat!

4. Remember your power. Every thought is a prayer!
If you haven’t checked out E-Squared: Nine Do-It-Yourself Energy Experiments That Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality yet, please do! It explains so many concepts of conscious creation with humor and ease. Here’s a little testament to the power of your mind: “The only reason Jesus could walk on water was because 100 percent of his thoughts (prayers) believed he could. He had overcome the world’s thought system that says Only an idiot would be stupid enough to step out of the boat. There was not one doubt–not a single thought (prayer) in his consciousness that didn’t fully believe it.”

5. Read David Cain’s blog, Raptitude.
I was going to pile a bunch more tips in this edition based on David’s articles, but you should really just go read them yourself. First: Why most problems never have to be solved. To summarize: write down each problem as it occurs to you on a post-it. Then go through your post-its at the end of the week and prove to yourself how many things do work themselves out. Then read The First World’s biggest addiction. David explains how every time we reach for coffee or alcohol or food or our phones, “we are training ourselves to be needy and dependent on circumstances.” Finally, check out 15 unexpected side-benefits to living in the present moment to convince your mind to try it out, right now.

Feeling

6. Examine your anxiety.
I came across this tumblr post about the long term effects of anxiety: shortness of breath, rashes, headaches, and fatigue to name a few. I’ve had all of those symptoms and it suddenly occurred to me that my inexplicable asthma and allergies are likely just caused by anxiety. Again and again I remind myself to relax and stop worrying. Now that I have made the connection between my thoughts and physical symptoms, I can be more conscious of my triggers, and more devoted to chilling the eff out.

7. Find your muse: channel desire into creativity.
You know when you want someone so bad it drives you crazy and you can’t think of anything else? You can tap into that energy and use it to drive your creative work. From Think and Grow Rich:

The energy must be transmuted from desire for physical contact, into some other form of desire and action, before it will lift one to the status of a genius…The salesman who knows how to take his mind off the subject of sex, and direct it in sales effort with as much enthusiasm and determination as he would apply to its original purpose, has acquired the art of sex transmutation.

Being

8. If you flow, you’re a flower.
I found this gem by Forest Sage in the Universal Geometry Spirit Science video. “If you labor, you are a ‘laborer’. If you work on a farm, you are a ‘farmer’. And if you flow, you are a ‘Flower’.” Finally, an answer to, “What do you do?”

9. Be a joy for yourself to watch.
This reality you’re seeing is for your eyes only. You are the performer, and you are the audience. Don’t let what other people think influence what you do. Just do what delights you, right now. Sing while you do the chores. Type with a flourish. Sit up straight and smile for your camera. The only purpose this moment has is for you to enjoy it. And when you take pleasure in being yourself, others will too.

Daily Guide to Life Design #12: Flow

 2014 January 2
by jessica mullen   Comments Off 

Cecil the cape sundew

The tree grows from a seed effortlessly. The flower blooms naturally. Life just flows.

There is a rhythm to life that you can connect to at any time. You can hear it in music, see it in dance, taste it in fruit. When you silence your mind, you can feel it in your body.

Have your desires and let them go. The flow of life will bring them to you. Let what’s happening, happen. It’s the flow of life. Let what you see, be. Let yourself be who you are, where you are. You are in the flow of life.

Any time you feel stress, struggle, or strain, remember the flow of life. It is never a struggle to blossom. It is an allowing. When you allow life to unfold, you are connected to the rhythm of life.

To literally feel the universal rhythm, try playing with flow toys like Astrojax or hula hoops or poi. They’ll help you remember how to be effortless.